January 31, 2008...9:30 pm
An Apology, Of Sorts
I was at Mee Rebus Tuesday this week, with Wahti, my boss and the rest of the gang, when Captain and Rocky asked me about the lack of updates on my blog. And I told them the truth, “I’ve been uninspired.” And that I have been. Since New Year’s - I have had the time to rethink made decisions, a potentially huge job offer, what I plan to do with the resources available to me, and whether or not I will be able to continue what I have started with blogging, Bolehland, votED, my socio-political activism activities (:P), and I had to think about it seriously.
It was taking a toll on my entire being. Someone once told me, the job of a journalist, the job of an activist, and those who are the ‘ma chais’ working the trenches, is a tiring, thankless job that takes a lot out of you - and you are required to no it with no expectations. It is love unconditional, that you try everyday, failure or not, brick wall or not, pain and hurt or not… you keep on keeping on - with the hope that someday things might actually change.
This year, I stopped reading the papers. And I found new dignity in my profession, amongst the lies, amongst the corruption, amongst the notoriety. I am staying to finish what I started with TELL. This year too, I will embark on many deeply personal journeys to making myself better for the cause in which I am fighting for. With the right people behind me, supporting me, I think I can do it. This year I apply for scholarships to do my Masters in Human Rights and Public Policy. It was a tough decision to make, due to a variety of personal reasons - but it’s something I have to do for my own sake.
My Paps, Haris Ibrahim has been a guiding light in showing the Man that civil society can rise up above it’s apathy and take charge again. And living life with dignity and compassion - that, is the measure of a man. The enormous support we get, in the simplest of ways, if often what keeps us going. Through votED, I’ve met some of the best Malaysians there are, and most importantly, I have received approval for my work from the people that matter the most - my family and friends.
My mom cancelled her subscription the the MSM papers and over Christmas, my family sealed their approval with regards to the work and decisions I have made. So now, it is up to me to move in the right direction, and insyAllah, I will.
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6 Comments
February 4, 2008 at 1:44 am
Hey Meesh - dropping a line to say you’ve all my support. Was telling someone earlier that sometimes, you have to admit your limits so that what you choose to prioritise, will soar. Trust your gut and heart to guide you. I know I do. Hugs
February 15, 2008 at 8:47 am
InsyaAllah, Meesh. you’ll be just fine.
Good luck
-Diyana Shahrom.
February 18, 2008 at 7:36 am
Hi Meesh,
How’s it going? You know I really wanted to go and try Kak Ton’s Mee Rebus, but I simply do not have the address or where to find the place.
Take care.
February 23, 2008 at 6:35 am
Sorry if this comes as an intrusion but there is an effort to get as many bloggers as possible to blog about bloggers whom are running for public offices on one particular day. One blogger candidate per day.
Below is the list:
1. Nik Nazmi Nik Ahmad (Friday, February 29)
2. Tony Pua (Saturday, March 1)
3. Elizabeth Wong (Sunday, March 2)
4. Jeff Ooi (Monday, March 3)
5. che’GuBard (Tuesday, March 4)
Please join! For more information, visit http://maddruid.com/?p=1563
March 17, 2008 at 9:41 am
Here is the latest blog created by my conscience, the real reflection of me: Raja Petra bin Raja Kamaruddin …
RAJA MONGREL!
Hear me confess at http://rajamongrel.blogspot.com/ ie. Raja Mongrel dot Blogspot dot com
Yours truly
Raja Petra bin Raja Kamaruddin (Now & Official)
King Sultan Raja Prophet Nabi Petra Kamaruddin (In Progress … Note no more ‘Bin’ in my name)
April 2, 2008 at 6:52 pm
Plenty to write,man. We have failed Minister being appointed “advisers” with minierial rank, a lezzie put in charge of tourism, Samy still in denial mode like rest of BN, PR Govts in 4 states at least. And it looks like Anwar might even pull the rug from under AAB if he can get the East Malaysians to show some backbone.
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